So who do you invite to your wedding?
The first thing you both need to do is have a discussion about the number of guests you would be comfortable having at your wedding. This can be an interesting chat as one of you may think 100 is perfect while the other imagines all their cousins, work colleagues, distant relatives at the wedding & be happy with a wedding of 200 people plus.
The number of guests you have will dictate your budget, venue and nearly all other aspects of your wedding. Remember the number of guests you have means each element is multiplied by that number – so 50, 100 or 250 meals, chair covers, favours, place names etc
Write down the names of everyone you can think of inviting & if your parents are contributing, everyone they would like to invite. It can be a good idea to give each set of parents a pre-determined number of invites and let them decided from here who they wish to invite. Yes it can look scary when you see all the names in black & white but this way you are less likely to forget someone. Next divide the list into 4 groups – must come (immediate family & best friends), definitely invited, wish list/evening only and not invited. This may sound harsh but it will help you get a clear picture of who you can invite based on numbers or budget. If you are having difficulty deciding on certain guests then a good question to ask yourself is “will they be a part of my life in the future”.
The “Plus One” question! This will always be a harder task if your numbers are restricted but a good rule of thumb is don’t invite a guest plus one unless they are engaged, living together or is in a long term relationship. If you are inviting someone as part of a group of work colleagues then you don’t need to invite their partner. If you are having a wedding abroad however, you may want to consider allowing your single friends to bring a plus one as it can be much harder for them to be on their own when you & your family are busy organising last minute details & rehearsal dinners in a foreign country. Be prepared that if your judgement call on the plus one is off then neither may come.
And what about children? This is a very personal decision but one you will need to make very clear to your family & friends from the start. If you only want children in the bridal party or no children at all then let people know why you’ve made your decision. This can often defuse any tension about the situation. For out of town guests you can let them know that there are no children at the wedding but give them a list of babysitter’s that would be available to mind their children during the day/night of the wedding.
A very wise move is to add a few extra places to your initial guest list & also review your guest list every 6 months or so. From your engagement to the time you send out the invitations can be 12-18 months and your sister’s new partner might be part of the family by your wedding date!
If you have any questions or guest list dilemmas please let me know & I’ll do my best to point you in the right direction.
**Read the article here: http://blog.weddingdates.ie/weddings-so-who-do-you-need-to-invite/